I have a good working relationship with everyone at my current place of employment, working with several contractors, customers, and engineers. I am one of the only women which was uncomfortable for me at first. Not all men are inherently bad, but when you work in a male dominated industry, it can be a bit intimidating at times.
There’s one contractor in particular that is very nice and respectful – to my face, but not behind my back apparently. I received a text that wasn’t meant for me accidentally, but it was about me and I was referred to as an offensive term in Spanish.
When I received the text I was to meet with him in about an hour and I knew he figured out he had sent it to me and not his boss. I was nervous about the meeting but he acted no different. I haven’t said anything as of the time I’m writing this article. I want to say something but I don’t know how to word it. I want to tell my boss (who isn’t his boss) or his boss. I’m starting to think maybe this is how he and his boss talk about me when I’m not around.
It really upset me because I’ve been nothing but nice and accommodating, going out of my way to make things easier for them. I will not apologize for my sensitivity and I shouldn’t have to. Many people may say I need to ” toughen up” especially since I work with mostly men. No! It shouldn’t be up to me to not be so sensitive. People just need to respect one another. Maybe I shouldn’t work in a male dominated industry. I’m not the type to stand up for myself and that can be a problem when things like this happen.
I still haven’t decided how I’m going to handle this. My boss is on vacation until next week (of course). I want to just tell the guy that what he said is an inappropriate way to talk about me. What I’m struggling with is the fact that the text wasn’t meant for me to see. I just don’t know what to do. Any suggestions??